I must admit that this feeling, that there is a human being that is a direct piece of you, did not take root right away with the birth of David. In fact, I remember feeling somewhat frightened of having no feelings at all, as if I was some kind of monster, having no emotion towards my newborn child, and even the widly spread cliche of “The Finger Grab” that suddenly transforms a neandarthal prehestoric caveman into a loving father, was exactly that for me, a cliche.
Two months later, seeing him grow, reacting to our voices, smiling, and laughing, has melted my heart, I feel the magic of fatherhood, I started seeing David as something so divine, so majestical, as if an Upper Force has seen merit in me, in us, as a family, to be a worthy environment to raise him, to guide him to find his purpose, and to become what was meant for him in this world.
What has changed in my life?
Change is somewhat of an uncomfortable word. I prefer “evolved”, it became more qualitative, warmer, fuller, and all in all, I sometimes see myself as my son’s student. As if he was sent here to teach and help us grow, and not the other way around.