What does it mean to be a mother

My friends are my source of inspiration and information. They give me advices, share their experiences. Our lives are so different. But there is one thing that unites us, we are all mothers. I started to ask all of them: what does it mean to be a mother. And I note their answers here for you.

Olga is a mother of 3 sons. She is a forward-looking psychologist with a great experience. And very beautiful and charming woman. I know her as calm, patient, kind and self-assured young girl)

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My dreams… like a pie in the sky, unreal and insane. I don’t dream  about regular things.

That’s why, probably, I never dreamt about kids. Even when I was 25, during 5-th year of my marriage, I still wasn’t sure, if I want a child. I didn’t have this desire even instinctively.

Being raised without any siblings (I didn’t even have any cousins), I certainly was a center of the universe. Everything was only for me. I didn’t even have any pets. I never took care of anyone.

First child – was a shock. My active way of living, work at the university, traineeship, therapy groups, drama groups, trainings, business projects – they all almost stopped to exist! Because HE, my baby, wasn’t ready to be without me, even 10 minutes. I don’t even mention the childbirth process it self. The other (previous) me and my former freedom died there for ever.

First 6 month, Sasha, lived only on me. Slept, ate and strolled. And I was running mad, because of desperation and because I thought that it was going to last for ever. I was definitely not ready for such a level of self-sacrifice. But at that moment there was nothing I could change. When Sasha turned 8 month, we got a babysitter.

Now I understand, that I was a fanatic mother. But with that child, I couldn’t be any different. I actually was a bit fanatic with my second and my third too. And I still am.

Now I’ve got three sons! They changed me dramatically. They taught me to be gentle, caring and patient. They taught me how to love.

Now I learn how to balance motherhood and bunch of activities and personal interests. Eventually I understood, that life is not over, when you have a baby. Though, it changes a lot.

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