Being a parent is not an easy work. Yes, it is work. The most important and high-profile work in your entire life. The world of parenting isn’t made of black and white or right and wrong. It’s all shades of grey
(give me a brake, don’t even mention that book). How many time have you heard your child saying those ugly words: “I hate you!”?
Oh! Sure if you are one of those perfect moms, just ignore this blogpost.
For those ordinary worldly moms like myself, I have something to say.
Todays generation is known to be smarter, than any other generation before. But on the other side it is also the laziest and the rudest. They are sly spoiled brats, that easily get what they want. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not talking about any particular child. It’s a common state. How did that happen?
It’s a long discussion. In my opinion it’s all our fault. They get everything way to easy and there is no boundaries in anything. How can you build boundaries if everything is absolutely get-at-able?
Yesterday I witnessed a very educative situation while I was shopping. A mother with a daughter had to live the shop, because she was accused of being harsh with her daughter. And all she did was saying NO! She just didn’t allow her child to buy chocolate. The girl started crying hysterically. And everybody started to meddle.
One of my friends recently called me to tell the story, that happened to her son and herself. When she decided to limit his computer time from 6 hours daily to only 1 hour, he said he’s going to call social services and complain on her.
What can be done to avoid this situations?
We have to form inner values and understanding of how things work. Here are some useful tips, that might come in handy.
1. Be an example.
We’ve already talked about it before. So I’ll just mention how important it is to set a right example. Don’t contradict yourself. If you want your child to make the right choice, show him how you do it yourself.
2. Let your child do difficult work.
Just imagine how much self-confidence he will gain when he’ll succeed. It’s beneficial even if your kid fails to do it. That’s how he learns, that sometimes you fail and it is normal.
3. Let your child experience the loss.
this will help him to build a connection between causes and consequences. If he brakes his toy, don’t rush to the store to get another one.
4. Teach to take responsibility.
If your child did something wrong or bad, help him face it, confess and take the responsibility of changing the situation for the better.
5. Teach to control time.
You are not always there to say that it’s time to turn on TV or start doing homework. Present him a watch or an alarm clock.
6. Engage to help others.
Whether it’s reading with smaller brother or helping grandmother with shopping. Helping others has to become a part of your child’s everyday life. Only this way he will understand that other people have their problems and needs as well.
7. Show your child the value of money.
Give your child a money-box. If your child desperately wants something, remind him that he has his own money. And you are ready to add some if needed. This way your child will learn to make deliberate decisions and value money.