Yulia Gippenreyter is a modern Russian psychologist. Her research is dedicated to experimental psychology (sight, perception, attention, motion), family therapy and neuro-linguistic programming. This woman is a legend. Generations of parents based their upbringing methods on her priceless advices.
Though, sometimes she might seem to be a little rough on my opinion, her statements are worth reading. She has an incredible gift of understanding kids.
12 quotes that will reach your heart
Problematic, hard and obstinate children, as well as children with complexes, miserable and depressed children – are always just a reaction of wrong and inadequate family relations.
To love a child unconditionally – doesn’t mean to love him for his beauty, smarts, cleverness etc… but just because he is the way he is!
The more parents criticize and snub the kid the earlier he comes up to a conclusion: “I’m not loved”.
Take a hands-off approach when your child is doing something and not asking you for help. This is how you say: “You are ok, you are join to succeed”. But if the child is facing a serious obstacle which he can’t deal with by himself – is a whole different story and nonintervention might make it only worse.
If child can’t win through something and is asking for help – help. But make sure you do only those things the he can’t do by himself. As he learns new skills gradually let him lead.
Personality and potential develop only in the field that was chosen on child’s own free will.
Temptations are like tramps – let one in and he returns with his friends.
You can complain of child’s actions, but not the child himself! You can judge child’s actions, but not his feelings! Complaining shouldn’t be systematic.
Undesired behavior of the child is just a normal reaction on abnormal living conditions.
Strict mother is emotionally unconnected with a child. At least it’s the way he feels it.
Give your child an opportunity to be himself. Don’t encourage, lecture, don’t make him do something.
Isn’t it known that observing yourself doing something can lead your attention away?